Candy Theory (Thought-of-the-week)

If you're reading this it means that my catchy phrase worked and I caught your attention (Yay for me!) This week's thought came from a really interesting conversation I had with the very talented brain-picking Daniela Scholz (she actually asked to be mentioned in this post even though I said that one's sources must always remain confidential, but she's a pushy one that girl...I love you Dani!).
You guys may not know this but we have some very deep and interesting conversations (funny as hell too). We were talking about our very strange and failed love lives-don't judge I know you all have horror stories to tell even if right now you're living your fairy tale- and we came up with a very interesting metaphor to describe our current situations (However, I will not reveal who belongs to which situation) and I have named it-very cleverly I must add- the Candy Theory.

She doesn't know about cavities...yet!

So, the Candy Theory basically consists of the idea that people's love lives can be seen as a kid with a big bag of candy. How does that make any sense you ask? Well it's very simple, some kids are luckier than others and some just do dumb things. Point is they all react differently when given a big bag full of candy, however they all wish for one thing: to eat it.

In some cases our love lives may look like a kid that at some point was given a big bag of candy and decided it was a great idea to eat it all at once. The result? A very bad stomachache sets in immediately after, a couple of days later this stupid kid finds himself craving for a candy bar but not having any and in the long run the same kid finds out he's got cavities! Of course filling those cavities is going to take time, money and pain! Stupid kid...

This is a better use for those candy bags...

Kid number two is just a case of bad luck, poor thing really deserves that piece of candy. You know, you've worked hard to get everything in your life to work out the way it's supposed to and then you stop and think why is it that love life just doesn't seem to work out? And then it hits you: Your stupid bag has a big hole at the bottom. How could you not see that? All this time you were throwing your candy in the bag and all the while those candies were falling out through the hole... Stupid bag... Well good thing you found out so you can start patching up that bag! You've worked hard at everything else and this will be no exception! What's great about it? You'll learn to really take care of those candies once you get that bag fixed up...


Now not everything is just victims in this story, there's always that greedy kid you see at every party collecting candy and doing everything in his power to get his way. This kind is dangerous because he will stop at nothing to get what he wants even if it means pushing and hurting all the other kids. Greedy candy-lovers are the worst! Their bags are always full and they always high on sugar. They won't hesitate to take candy from your hands or even cutting a hole at the bottom of your bag... The good news? Those kids grow up to be diabetic and obese... So rest assured, we will all get what we deserve eventually.

This girl had a bra made of candy and not even that worked out? Damn, we're all screwed...

 So my final thought is, no matter what kind of candy eaters we are, it is never too late to decide to change your situation. I encourage you to think long and hard about this crazy idea of ours and consider what you'll do next time...

XO

Things I've always wanted to say to a man.

                                                             

If we have anything in common with each other, I'm guessing there are times in your lives when you simply want to say some very mean, nasty things to people around you. Whether it is a crush that won't make his/her move or a lover you're frustrated with or maybe a friend who took it a little too far while throwing a temper tantrum. Sometimes you just gotta get it out of your chest. Well, I have thrown together a few of my favorite phrases that I have sometimes thought of but never really had the guts/chance to say to other people while they are acting like complete idiots...


1. Hey, quick question, did your penis fall off? 'Cause you're kind of acting like a chick right now...

2. I'm sorry you seem to be mistaking me with someone who cares!

3. (I actually got very close to saying this to a girl I used to work with) What in the world ever possessed you to think that out of all haircuts THAT was the one that would look good on you?! (not that she can look good in any hair style)

4. You know, you got one of those faces that just makes me want to smack you, can I?

5. Sure you can stomp all over my heart, what else is it there for anyways? And while you're at it why don't you date my best friend too? Oh wait... (ouch!) (no harm intended to anyone reading this...)

6. I quit!... No, I like my job but you're an ass...

7. (To the really gross men in the street) They're called legs... haven't you ever seen a pair before?

8. I'm not your mother, stop asking me to fix your life...(another one I got incredibly close to blurt out once or twice)

9. I'm actually a really nice person, is just you that I hate...(instead I said "I was just kidding when I called you that")(I called her a whiny bitch)

10. (I decided to put this one on the list because I actually used it once) Well if I'm such a horrible friend, I know a way to fix it! (then, click...)

There you have it! Something random I like to waste my time with... Coming up with mean things to say when the time is right... I hope you liked my catchy phrases and if you ever feel you have the right moment to use them, please go ahead!

Feel free to add some you like in the comment area.

See you later...

Verano, ¿en pantalones?

Hola de nuevo!

Hoy les presento nada mas y nada menos que una nueva obsesión que ha llegado a mi en la banal forma de
pantalones cortos!

Asi es, lo han adivinado (¡aplauso para ustedes!) esta entrada se trata de ropa... y moda... (si esto no le interesa en lo mas mínimo, huya ¡ahora!).

Mientras que en nuestro pulgarcito nos estamos inundando con las lluvias de invierno, el resto del mundo (literalmente) se prepara para darle la bienvenida al verano. Con la llegada de una nueva estación del año, en el mundo de la moda (y el capitalismo y el comercio y el turismo, etc) se preparan como locos para la estación mas caliente del año (espero hayan comprendido mi doble sentido) el verano.

Un look mas relajado y casual.

La moda de verano esta plagada de atuendos minimos y muuuuuuchos trajes de baño. La tendencia este verano es mostrar piel sin olvidar el toque chic. Y si bien hay tendencias para todos los tamaños y gustos, hay una que ha llamado mi atención. Los "lace shorts" son basicamente los pantalones cortos que ya todos conocemos con el toque femenino del encaje. Puede sonar algo extraño pero se ven super lindos. Lo mejor de ellos es que los pueden usar de dia con flats y un top mas sencillo o de noche con zapatos altos y un top mas elegante o atrevido dependiendo de sus gustos.

No me aguanto porque estos lleguen hasta este lado del continente y tener mi par (o dos o tres...) Aunque es posible que no espere mucho y me aventure a hacerlos yo misma. El otro día estaba viendo unos videos de DIY en youtube y encontre un video super útil de como hacer sus propios lace shorts. Pienso que no perderia nada con probarlo... Si ustedes tambien estan enamoradas de esta tendencia y se atreven, les animo a tomar el desafío y ponerse manos a la obra!

Además de unas cuantas imagenes de los shorts, les dejo el link del DIY video si quieren probar... Me cuentan que tal les va!!

Nos vemos pronto!

Haz click aquí para DIY Lace shorts tutorial ♥

Thought-of-the-week! (plus bonus question)

Hi there! It's me again. This time I'm bringing you... that's right, you guessed it! It's my: thought-of-the-week.

Well this week's thought came to me partially in a dream, part as a post-birthday-revelation and the other part from plain having too much time on my hands...

Actually, this week's thought is also a little bit of a situation for me. I had this dream a couple of nights ago where I was back in high school (sounds like a nightmare I know) and was talking to a really cute guy who apparently was my classmate and crush (of course!). Anyways, in my dream I was struggling with either telling this guy that I liked him or just keeping it to myself. At the end of the dream, like in every good teen movie from the 90's, I gathered courage and told him. The final result? We became something of an item. What's funny about this dream is that when I woke up I couldn't help but remembering how good it felt to be with this guy in my dream, you know what I mean, just the thought of "he's my boyfriend and he's ever so dreamy!" somehow, this lingering feeling brought me back to a conversation I had had with a good friend of mine a couple of weeks ago. She, who happens to be very insightful and sneaky, told me how I should gather courage and do the things I want-need to do for myself. She basically told me to stop being such a little girl and grow a pair! I, of course, laughed it off and put it all behind me as soon as the conversation was over (sorry girl!).

Now I know you're wondering where do these fascinating stories lead us to? My issue this week (as it has been for a few weeks now) is whether or not I should utter a secret I've been keeping. Now, before you all get too excited is not like a state secret or anything of the sort, it's just a little thing that seems to be eating at me and doesn't really allow me to concentrate on anything else. It involves me and one more person who would, should it be revealed, be the only ones affected by it. As fate would have it, if I do tell "the secret" I could lose this person's friendship or I could also gain something that I feel could be so great. There are other things to consider here as well, for instance my pride which is at stake. If I tell and get shut down? I'll feel terrible and so humiliated! So, knowing this information I hereby ask: What should I do? Let go of all fears and just say it? or Should I keep it to myself, as I have for so long now, and wait until I no longer feel like it's going to drive me crazy unless I tell the other person everything I want to say.?

What do you people out there reading this think? I encourage you to comment and tell whether you've been in such a position before and what did you do or if you have any advise to give. I'll be listening...

  

Chico conoce chica; chico se queda con la chica PARTE II

AJA! Vuelven por mas!! Gracias a quienes han leido la primera parte de este pequeño articulo que me he tomado la tarea exhaustiva de escribir... Ahora, volvamos a los negocios.

Numero 4: La conquista. Ahora que hemos llegado a este momento tan importante del nada fácil pero muy divertido proceso es necesario analizar el lenguaje femenino. En muchas ocasiones es difícil determinar si el sujeto a conquistar está o no interesado en ser conquistado, sin embargo hay ciertas "señales" que el sujeto envia algunas veces de manera inconsciente y otras intencionalmente dependiendo del nivel de interes/ disponibilidad del individuo en cuestión. Algunas clásicas son: siempre acepta una oportunidad de estar cerca tuyo y busca contacto fisico (no se emocionen hablamos de lo basico; abrazos, besos en la mejilla "porque hiciste algo que le gusto o que fue un buen detalle", deja que le agarres la mano y no establece límite de tiempo, permite que pases tu brazo alrededor de sus hombros, etc...) en el mejor de los casos el contacto físico primario se convierte en besos y caricias- muy buen trabajo si has llegado hasta aqui! Ojo, después del primer beso el sujeto comenzara a crear ciertas imagenes en su cabeza y a crear fantasías de lo que podría suceder (no hablamos de fantasías sexuales-pervertidos, concentrense!- hablamos de fantasías de la relación en potencia). Una vez alcanzado este nivel es importante comenzar a reflexionar sobre el siguiente paso a tomar.

En vista que aun no has determinado si el sujeto desea continuar al siguiente nivel o si desea dejar que la magia se evapore junto-con los ultimos efectos de la serotonina (si, se que vas a buscar esa palabra en google)- es conveniente que prestes atención a su comportamiento y que pongas especial cuidado en el tuyo. Por ejemplo, una chera que busca mas que solo "diversión" no se preocupara en llamarte o saber sobre tu día o tus problemas como lo hara la que este interesada en algo mas (si, nosotras tambien funcionamos como los hombres en algunas ocasiones). En este punto es importante que si ya has tomado tu decisión sobre lo que quieres hacer a continuación, mantengas contacto constante con ella haciéndole saber que te interesa continuar o simplemente comenzar a guardar algo de distancia para que ella comprenda tu falta de interés. En algunos casos, encotraras sujetos que no esperarán tus señales sutiles, estos sujetos se conocen por ser emocionalmente necesitados y tratarán a toda costa de hacerte entrar en una relación. Si no tenes cuidado y no manejas bien la situación estas personas acaban siendo tus enemigas declaradas. Una vez esto suceda, no podrás hacer nada para que ella o sus pares te consideren un buen partido o en todo caso un buen ser humano.

Ahora, ¿qué sucede si el sujeto en cuestión percibe tus tentativas de una relación y no las acepta? Muy sencillo: alejate. Es lo mas sano que podes hacer, por el bien de ambos- nos tomamos la salud mental muy en serio. Si, por otro lado, el sujeto responde positivamente a este nuevo acercamiento e interés es necesario no dejar pasar demasiado tiempo en esta etapa de cortejo. Lo mejor siempre es ser sincero acerca de tus intenciones. Después de todo, todos somos adultos aqui- o por lo menos eso queremos creer- asi que lo mejor que podés hacer es armarte de valor y tener "la plática".

Bueno, eso no fue tan complicado después de todo. Lo has logrado, has sobrevivido a este ameno tutorial sobre los niños y las niñas. Si mi tutorial no te resulto muy útil es porque no soy ni psicólogo ni consejero espiritual, simplemente hablo de lo que me parece sentido común. No crean que soy alguna especie de Hitch (yo se que viste esa película asi que no actues como si no supieras de lo que hablo) y definitivamente no soy ninguna casamentera (¡gracias al cielo!). Simplemente aventurense en ese nuevo territorio, no puede ser tan malo. Recuerden que todos y todas somos diferentes y que siempre se gana algo nuevo de toda experiencia. Mucha suerte para usted que esta en cualquiera de esas etapas y disfrutelo mientras pueda.

Nos vemos luego.

"chico conoce a chica; chico se queda con la chica" PARTE I

¡Hola de nuevo!

El tema de hoy me vino a la mente hace un par de días gracias a una conversación que tuve con un amigo. El amigo en cuestión me decía que a veces las mujeres estamos rodeadas de un cierto "misterio" que nos hace indescifrables para el sexo opuesto convirtiendonos en una especie de codigo secreto (esa es mi versión bonita de las cosas, el solo dijo "las mujeres son dificiles de entender con esas sus señales confusas"). En todo caso, despues de un poco de reflexión me di cuenta que en repetidas ocasiones he tenido esa misma conversación con diferentes personas (todos del sexo opuesto) lo que me trajo hasta aqui, este día me he propuesto crear una especie de "tutorial" para hombres. Y se dirán ustedes, hombres que por alguna extraña razón se encuentran leyendo esto: "¿Qué me puede decir ella que no haya alguien mas escrito ya?" La respuesta: ¡NADA! Pero yo nunca habia escrito acerca del tema a pesar que he dado consejos en varias ocasiones relacionados a la psique femenina y además, soy divertida asi que hagan el favor y continuen leyendo hasta el final. Gracias

Vamos a tratar de cubrir ciertos puntos importantes antes de continuar. Numero 1: Este tutorial esta dirijido a personas con sentido común, que entienden que hay ciertas cosas que bajo ninguna circunstancia se le hacen a las mujeres y que en caso de ocurrir la clausula de "terminación inmediata de la relación" se debe aplicar. Ejemplos claves a tener en consideración: Engañar; (no al estilo de te menti toda la semana para hacerte una fiesta sorpresa sino mas bien al estilo de te menti cuando te dije que la chera con la que me viste entrar al cine era mi prima- sabemos que NO es asi). Maltratar (no como te molesto porque te ves linda cuando pretendes que te enojas sino mas bien como me burle de ti frente a todos y te llame tonta e ignorante frente a tus amistades- El abuso físico-verbal-psicológico NO es atractivo). Abusar/ Usar a una mujer (ya saben a que me refiero, cosas como usarla solo porque me da dinero cuando ando en banca rota, usarla para que la chera que no me hizo caso vea que tengo otra, etc...). Si usted no forma parte de ninguna de las categorías anteriores o algún derivado de ellas le invito a continuar esta amena lectura.

Si usted paso exitosamente la etapa numero 1 del tutorial, ¡Felicidades! Usted no es ningún tipo de psicópata y no tratará de encontrarme para acosarme un par de meses y matarme al estilo jigsaw para enseñarme una lección sobre la vida y mas importante aún, usted califica para la etapa numero 2 del programa. Numero 2: Reconocimiento. Todo comienza con una misión de reconocimiento tanto para él como para ella. En este punto una relación aun no existe y no hay ningun tipo de expectativas. Es la tipica historia de "chico conoce a chica". Una vez se ha detectado el blanco es momento de las primeras impresiones. Si usted quiere salir airoso de la etapa de impresiones evite hacer cualquier cosa que perjudique la percepción del individuo que se desea atraer. Ejemplos claves a considerar: No intente llevarsela de galan de entrada (eso solo funciona si usted es Justin Timberlake o Ashton Kutcher) a las cheras respetables no nos gustan los casanovas. Cuide sus modales, el objetivo de sus afectos esta atenta a cualquier cosa que le parezca desagradable para descartarlo inmediatamente (ejemplos incluyen: eructar, hurgarse la nariz, la exposición innecesaria de cualquier tipo de fluido corporal, etc...). Finalmente: muestre interés y ponga atención a lo que ella diga pues esto resulta útil en la etapa de conquista.

Numero 3: Construyendo una "amistad". Es el momento de conocer a fondo al individuo que se desea conquistar. Se debe invertir tiempo en conocerla y verificar que existan intereses mutuos que puedan en un futuro ayudar en la conquista. En este punto es importante destacar que si usted esta interesado en llegar a la conquista es necesario que no deje pasar demasiado tiempo en esta etapa. Sin embargo si usted se ha dado cuenta que el objetivo incial no es un interés romántico este es el momento justo en el que usted debe de dejar de mostrar demasiado interés en el individuo ya que de lo contrario corre el riesgo de crear lo que se conoce bajo el termino científico de "falsas esperanzas". De igual forma, si usted ha alcanzado este punto y desea continuar su misión es necesario que pase al nivel 4.

Reality check

Hello again!

I know it's been a while since the last time we saw each other (to anyone who might be reading me out there) but I figured it's better late than never right?

I have come to you this time with a little idea that has popped into my head. A couple of days ago I made the unfortunate decision to act on an impulse and made a remark to someone who quite frankly does not deserve the attention (I know that now).

I'm a firm believer that we never stop learning in life. Whether it is through experiences, books, classes, interaction with other people, you name it! Call me crazy but I am one of those weird people who think that improving one self and seeking constant learning experiences is a positive thing. However sometimes I forget that not everyone shares my points of view on life.

The "incident" went down a little like this: someone made a public mistake and I called them out on it (I do have to admit it wasn't in a very nice manner but my purpose wasn't to be nice). Anyway I laughed at it and put it behind me without thinking about the ramifications of my actions- it was after all a little bit of well-deserved sarcasm I was putting out there for that person- I guess I don't need to say what happened next, a strange kind of "war" was unleashed between those who thought what I had done was great and those who, for some reason that still escapes me, took it as a personal offense.

I got caught in the middle of it and also got cut out of the conversation and left behind for others to bring me down and basically talk crap about me like I was some kind of "grammar mistakes Nazi".  People who were completely oblivious to the actual situation got involved and it ended with the one person I didn't expect to throw a low blow making comments that were out of place (and none of their business). Goes to show you must always distrust the quiet ones...

My point is I spent some time pondering how the situation got so out of hand. I felt powerless and angry. How did this little thing manage to snowball its way into my mind, leading to believe I had indeed done something wrong?? I'll tell you how! It had happened before to me! It all came pouring down on me. I am not a nice person!

The difference between me and those who made these stupid remarks? I am more upfront about it! I don't go around acting like I'm some sweet, nice little girl who'll stand in the background and keep her opinions to herself. However there is some people out there who act like they are so self-righteous when they are actually hypocrites! I was so mad that I had had someone take away my right to defend myself! People is just ridiculous sometimes. That's the conclusion I came to from this little story.

What I think is important- and actually worth mentioning- about this whole experience is that we can always improve ourselves even when we think we're right. Life has an interesting way of coming back and biting you in the ass when you act on a whim. Boy did I learn that today!

The message I'd like to leave you with tonight is learn how to pick your battles. Want to make an enemy? Tell an idiot he's wrong... (trying to be as nice as possible but I can't help myself). Want to look like an idiot? Fight another idiot... (that's right I called myself an idiot, because I can admit it when I have screwed up). I'll  try to stay out of harm's way from now on and I recommend you all do the same!

See you guys later...